Keeping up with the Joneses on Facebook

The boys and I looked forward to their spring break for weeks, if for no other reason than they wouldn't have to catch the bus at 6:43 every morning.

You can suck the fun right out of a relaxing spring break at home, however, just by checking your Facebook account. See, it's pretty cool to hang out at the park or go to the zoo … until you come home to read all your friends' Facebook updates about their cruises and beach trips.

After this week I'm pretty sure my three boys think that when my husband and I recited our marriage vows, we were actually promising to provide them with the most boring childhood possible. At least that's what it seems like when they compare what we do during school breaks to what a lot of their friends do.

See, my husband and I have this conservative philosophy about family traveling. We don’t leave town every time the kids have a few days off. In fact, we've always placed kids and trips on a graduating scale of grandiosity. We see the local sights first, early and often. Childhood should contain lots of camping and local road trips. As the kids' ages approach double digits, the family can drive farther and stay longer.

This philosophy also means we didn't take babies or toddlers on airplanes in non-emergency situations. It means no tropical islands for anyone under age 18, and no European vacations before junior or senior year in high school.

This unwritten rule is influenced by the fact that Tim and I never went to the Caribbean before our honeymoon, so why should our kids go there when they're 8 or 10? The older boys barely remember moving into this house when they were 8, and that was a pretty big deal. I'm not about to fork over ten grand for a Disney cruise that, five years later, I'll have to convince them they took because they only remember the round window in their cabin.

For my kids, staying in a motel is about the greatest thing ever. In fact, I could drive down to Highway 96, book a room in the Best Western, and my 6-year-old would literally be as excited as last year when I told him we were going to SeaWorld.

It’s not as if we don’t go anywhere. I’d say our kids have hit most of the major kid trip milestones, and we have many more on the to-visit list. It’s just that part of living in Brentwood is accepting that some folks’ to-visit lists get checked off before yours.

Internet access also puts you right there when your buddies update their lists online. Yep, I never knew how lame we really are until Facebook. At least when Tim and I were in school, we didn’t have to hear about anyone’s cross-country RV extravaganza until we got back to school and saw our friends’ “what I did during spring break” essays.

Nowadays, thanks to camera phones and Wi-Fi, my kids might get to see photos of their friends surfing or skiing while they’re, say, relaxing in the orthodontist’s waiting room.

Next year, I may proclaim our spring break Internet-free.

My kids will be so thrilled.